Sunday, October 21, 2012

Tailgate Grounded

Tailgate HQ on Gameday

The Tailgate maintained a low profile and tended to family activities for the weekend which of course meant fitting in 15 or so games on TV as well as Gameday at 7 AM. Mrs. Tailgate wants you all to know this was not her request, it was mine solely. The HQ den was adorned with 3 separate screens going at once as well as an additional 1 in the bar. Featured games were Texas A&M v LSU, Notre Dame v BYU, Boise v UNLV, Bama v Tennessee, K- state v West Virginia. Oregon State v Utah and many more.

Visited Spanos stadium at Cal Poly earlier last week

Around the Country: In the PAC 10 the much anticipated matchup in Tempe turned into a one sided desert tsunami sustained by the Sun Devils. Coach Graham couldn’t catch his breath until the Ducks had put up 43 on ASU…….in the first half! In the Big Lame in Berkley, the Stanford Tree and its ridiculous Band walked out of Strawberry Canyon with a non controversial win on the 30th anniversary of “The Play”. Oregon State remains perfect in an ugly win over the Utes in Corvallis in the rain at night. Congratulations to “Snap” Barkley for setting the PAC 12 passing record against that Division III school from Colorado.

Big 12 - TTU and TCU played perhaps the game of the day (that I did not see) a triple OT win for the Red Raiders in Fort Worth. T2 (Tommy Tuberville) has the Red Raiduhs playing some serious ball! Baylor and Texas scored a whole bunch of points on each other. Does anyone remember the Alamo? Those Texas teams could use a defense of the likes of what Davey Crockett, Travis, Bowie, Houston and John Wayne did in 1854 defending that plot of land in Texas against Santa Ana.

Texas Teams should remember the Alamo!
The Cowpokes earned a mild upset over the Cyclones that were planning on storming through Stillwater and the Sooners hasten the involuntary retirement of Charlie Weiss with an annihilation of the Jayhawks in Norman. Kansas State marches into Morgantown in a showdown of Heisman favorites. It was not even close. The Mountaineer faithful are devastated. It was rumored that they hired a Medium to invoke the ghost of Senator “Klan Boy” Byrd to appeal to Congress for defense funds. Bill Snyder and Colin “Optimus” Klein were heard singing on their way out of Morgantown. Take a listen below and turn up volume:

SEC - Bama silences 107,000 orange clad fans singing Rocky Top and filling their troughs with orange liquid (It’s true). AJ McCarron remains perfect on the year, 16 TD’s and 0 Ints. How can you not put him in that proverbial Heisman conversation now? Mississippi State takes care of bidness over MTSU setting up my dream of an undefeated SEC game in Tuscaloosa next week. Look for me on TV in my hounds tooth hat. Here is a little video I put together to mark the journey:

Ahhhh and Johnny Football had the air let out of him as the Bayou Bengals christened Kyle Field into the SEC. Okay, I will finally give the Gators some props as they shut up the "ole ball coach" and his loud mouth soup in the swamp convincingly.

Big 10 - Don’t look now but State Penn is 6-2 after delivering a knockout punch in Iowa City to the cleverly clad fans wearing Sandusky fashioned pin stripes. In the battle of the glove state, too much Dennard and his shoelaces in the end as the Patrick Swayze led Wolverines take down Sparty. Northwestern was caught napping in the 4th quarter going down to the children of the corn at Ryan Field. There was more red than purple in the stands.

The Purple Cats taking their pre-game nap

Urban and the Buckeyes continue to live dangerously as they eek another one out against a school from the state of Indiana for the second consecutive week.

The angry Castelein sisters with Brutus at the OSU - Indiana game. Their Mom is way cool!

ACC - Bedlam in Durham as the Dukies become Bowl eligible for the first time since the Ole Ball Coach graced the sidelines in Kryzewskiville 20 years ago. The students stormed the field, albeit somewhat awkwardly as this is a new ritual for them. The other Death Valley in Clemson, SC killed the dreams for the Hokies having another 10 + win season and Florida State disabled the Canes in the battle of the Sunshine State.

Other - The Fighting Irish continue to live dangerously staying undefeated by sprinkling some Leprechaun pixie dust on the Cougars in South Bend. The Irish are poised to take on the Sooners in Norman, OK next week along with the ESPN Gameday crew. Any of my Sooner peeps want to wage a side bet? In a Blackout on the Blue Turf in Boise, the Broncos put some black and blue marks on an improved UNLV squad. Locally San Jose State sieges the Alamodome for a runaway win. One more win and the Spartans are Bowl eligible. Navy battles Indiana to a 31 – 30 victory, Air Force scores a direct hit with a win over New Mexico. Sadly, Army gets blitzed again by EMU on the road.

Tradition of the week - In Norman, Ok after every Sooner score, the Sooner Schooner (covered wagon for you metropolitanites)traverses the field and the Boomer Sooner song plays over the loud speaker with 80,000 Okies thoroughly enjoying the ritual. I am just hopeful we won’t see much of this ritual next week when the Irish come calling.

Boomer Sooner

Hit of the week – Turn your sound up, pretty funny. This kid will take up theatre now.

Gripe of the week – oh what the heck, Mark May. I still can’t stand him and he has grown more pompous than ever. This is the first repeat “Gripe of The Week” in the history of the Tailgate. His likeability rating has to be the worst on ESPN, next to Colin CowTurd. This week, the big baby stormed off the set when he lost a decision to Lou Holtz on their little mock court. It doesn’t help him that he despises every team I like. Here is what the Boise faithful think of you May Day!

Next Week – The Tailgate will be hosted by Alabama Al in Tuscaloosa and joined by Tennessee Tony to partake in all the festivities of the Bama - MSU game at the historic Bryant Denny Stadium. Was thinking of buying a checkered fedora and a red sports coat for the occasion. Thoughts?

Happy Tailgating!