Irish Eyes Are Crying

How does one start his script after such an awesome experience in South Florida for the BCS “Ship” despite the ND blowout? Okay, how about this: I think I just participated in an MTV reality show like Real World called The House, where a bunch of characters co-habitat for a period of time. I was hosted by my old college buddy and Rugby Teammate Terry Big T “Family Guy” Kernan in a house he rented for the week in North Miami on the Intercoastal waterway. Joining us in The House were his Brother the former Governor of Indiana Joe Kernan, his South Bend buddy Gregg “Downsy” Downs and another pal Bill “Monsignor” Walsh.  The stories these 3 told about ND football history were beyond captivating. Also in our Reality show house, Terry’s 2 sons Joey and Terry Jr. AKA Stewie and Chris Griffin both Division III football stars, Counselor Mikey Mike Christin, Pete Buttigieg the current Mayor of South Bend, and several others lodged in our palace on the Florida Riviera. 

The Kernan Men

The House, came equipped with a pool and a pond, a pond would be good for you..... and too many rooms to count. It was reminiscent of my college days stumbling into the main gathering room each morning in boxers, scratching body parts, smacking your parched lips, and trying to open your eyes and asking those that were more alert “hey dude, what happened last night?” I learned that the Kartrashians house was one street over in our gated community. Thus, we had a reality TV show war going on and we didn’t even know it.

Talented ladies.....ha!

I have to give major props to our host Big T for going above and beyond all weekend to make sure everyone was well taken care of. I don’t remember him being this considerate back in our college days…but then again there is plenty I don’t remember or choose to forget from those days. After hitting the tarmac at 9 PM Saturday and being picked up by my old college buddy Paul Rip Reutershan we met up with the Kernan/McCarty clan at the local dive bar Flip Burger. Easy Ed McCarty, brother in law to Big T, and his charge were in attendance along with the Kernans. Flip Burger closes at 11 PM. We were finally asked kindly to leave at 1 AM.  Numerous liquid products were no longer in stock in bottle and barrel form when our crew of 12 finally exited. The celebration continued until sunrise talking politics, history, war and football with Big T and the Governor.  Paul was sleepy and decided to tuck in early. I learned that the Governor is a genuine American hero having served his country during Vietnam as a Naval Aviator. His plane was shot down over North Vietnam in 1972 and he was held prisoner by the North Vietnamese for 11 months.  Somehow through such a dark experience,  the Governor had us laughing out loud about the few funny things he recalled. Thank you for your service to our country sir! 

Naval Officer Joe Kernan

His twin brother

Sunday was a slow moving day with dips in the pool, lots of Gatorade and other forms of non toxic hydration fluids. I spent time talking with Bill Walsh who I dubbed the Monsignor when I learned he had been a priest for 12 years prior to a successful career in business and doing Don Imus impersonations. Bill travels the globe, chants with monks, plays basketball at age 73, hangs with the Kennedys, used to coach the 49ers and lives in Deadwood, South Dakota.  I am pretty sure he is featured in that HBO Series. 

Bill Walsh

Deadwood's finest!

The clans gathered again at another watering hole to watch our beloved Redskins go down in flames to none other than that detritus of a man known as Pete Carroll. Losing RG III to that gruesome injury was bad enough but watching Pete the Cheat take the credit for the win was beyond nauseating. Go Falcons!

Detritus Carroll slinking in the manure!

Game day started early in The House as host Terry “Big T” made a run to the market for all the provisions for the big tailgate. We loaded up 2 SUVS with people, provisions and plenty of expectations for the day. We arrived at Sun Life stadium and set up shop in lot 5 West about a stone’s throw from the stadium. The weather was low 80's, light humidity and plenty of Florida sunshine. I had to lather up my own Irish Golden Dome with 35 SPF so as to not let it turn crimson on me! Terry’s homemade deli sandwiches were taken down first, followed by grilled burgers, chicken and dogs later on. Plenty of personality in bottles were iced down and enjoyed.  Numerous members of the Kernan/McCarty clan and their friends made up the Tailgate. Fanatical Football fan Steve Koreivo and his son Eric joined us as well as Danville friend Dan Michelini and his crew. Bob Rigny of Rockville, MD and his family unit along with Sean Creamer, also a Rockvillian joined us. All in all, we had in the vicinity of 30 Tailgaters, all rabid ND fans, all with high hopes. 

Dan, EZ Ed, Tailgate Steve

The Guv, Dan Michelini and Friends and Dan

My Host with the most Big T and me honoring the colors!

Skylar, Rocket Ismail and Mikey Mike

Chris and Stewie Griffin

The ESPN Fan Zone adjacent to us featured country music star Luke Bryan cranking out his hit songs. Alabama women were rocking those cowboy boots and jean skirts and smiling so nicely at all the Yankees in the Tailgate lots.

Those boots were made for walking!

 
The atmosphere during the Tailgate hours leading up to kickoff was more energized than I have ever witnessed. You will not find two teams with a more passionate/knowledgeable fan base than Alabama and Notre Dame. With about an hour before kickoff, we shut down the tailgate, and made our way into the stadium. Sun Life Stadium is home to both the Miami Dolphins and the Miami Hurricanes. It is pretty much near nothing, but there was ample parking for pre game festivities and it holds 80,000+.

Big T, Tailgate Steve K and son Eric

The Kernan/McCarty Clan and friends

Bagpipe Magic!

The million dollar band.

 

Fans heading into the stadium

Tailgate Steve, Son Eric and Dan

My seat was on the 7 yard line, 21 rows up from the field. Sweetness! The only drawback was that it was in Crimson Tide territory. How would they react to this Yankee heretic who does not believe in the SEC gospel as all football fans should submit to? Would they issue a Fatwa on me? Other than one inebriated fan in front of me who had to be politely asked to not wave his crimson pom pom in my eye or else…, the Bama faithful were kind, courteous and soon to be ecstatic! Bama diehard, Dr Paul Enochs and his wife Jean sat next to me along with Coach Rick Neuheisel and his wife. Of course I had to make a fool of myself and disturb poor Coach Neuheisel and shake his hand as he tried to eat his hot dog. At Halftime with the score 28-0, Doctor Paul felt so bad for me he insisted on buying me a can of liquid gold. I asked him is my prognosis that obvious? Well no need to rehash the game, because most of you watched what I saw. 

Nice Seats dude!

The effects of a long day in the hot sun!

The good Doctor and his wife, Neuhisel visible in the background

The game was lost on the coin toss when ND deferred to the 2^nd half to receive. It pretty much went down-hill from there. Half of the air went out of the stadium by the second quarter. Yes there were questionable calls in the first quarter, but I doubt they would have had an impact on the end result. Simply put, that was a beat down in the worst way. Congratulations to Alabama and their dynasty. From those watching it on TV, I heard that Brent Pedoberger provided some of the best entertainment of the night.  Just ask AJ McCarron:

Brent Musberger perving out:


The post game gathering was subdued as we waited out the massive traffic and fired up the grill for more goodies and drank our sorrows away. It didn’t help. Nonetheless, I would not have traded the experience for anything.  I am forever grateful for the ticket that was found for me at face value by Larry Clawz, the lodgings, hospitality and Tailgating provided by Big T, and the new friendships that were made throughout the weekend. Hope to see you all next year in Pasadena!

Bama Celebrates, Irish stunned

Ray Finkle spotted leaving the stadium

Gripe of the week – This has happened to me three times this year, most recently at the BCS championship: NO PROGRAMS AVAILABLE!  Hey I collect gameday programs and look forward to buying one at each and every game I attend. These things become collector’s items over time and are chock full of Cliff Clavenesque tidbits to quench your thirst for CFB knowledge. At the BCS Championship, I set out three hours before the game looking for vendors selling the gameday programs. I could not find any. Apparently there was one in an apparel shop inside the ESPN Fan Zone. I did not have a ticket to that junket so I figured I would get one later when I went in the stadium. I entered the stadium over an hour before kickoff. I traversed the concourse searching high and low, low crawling on the cold concrete, rappelling from the top of the stadium,  hurdling over beer vendors in search of the magical program. Nada. Eventually some dweeb stepped out of an apparel shop announcing that the whole stadium was out of programs.  How could this be? I did not see one person in the stadium with a program and I only knew of one person who bought one. Common sense would tell you that if you have 80,000 + fans you ought to print more than 2,000 programs.  These are keepsakes for crying out loud!  The BCS Orange Bowl people have a lot to learn if they want to get it right.

I will be doing one more write up that will be a season recap and then I will be going into my post season rehab and Jenny Craig programs!

Happy Tailgating!

Roses are Red (special edition)

Another grand opportunity popped up over Christmas break to attend a major Bowl game which was too hard to pass up. It turned out to be an offer to attend the Granddaddy of them all, the incomparable Rose Bowl! Have you ever tried to get up at 4 AM on New year’s Day and ride in a Griswold cruising vessel for 5+hours through methane filled cow fields to restart the party? It would be easier just pulling an all nighter and roll with the punches the next day. As it was, we met up in Danville at 4:45 AM and made the 5 + hour trip south to Pasadena. David “Yo Adrienne” Seals in all his roidness (more on that later) captained the vessel that took us down Interstate 5 to the venerable old stadium. We were joined in the “Shaggin Wagon” by Mark Byron and Ken Croley.  We met up with the other half of our crew at the pre game ritual, Wisconsin diehards Jim McCourt and his fellow cheese heads Dave and Ken.
 

Yo Adrian, my eyes are swollen!

We set up our tailgate on the dog leg left of the 8^th hole of the Brookside Municipal Golf Course adjacent to the Rose Bowl. Seriously, the majority of the Rose Bowl tailgating is done on a nice golf course next to the stadium!  During our festivities the assistant greens keeper was even spotted killing gophers, not golfers otherwise they would have locked him up and thrown away the keys! 

The assistant greens keeper ready to hunt gopher.

The pre game Tailgate menu consisted of Sis’s famous Wisconsin beer brats that were met with approval from our Wisconsin guests, polish sausages and something simply labeled “meat” in a container with marinade provided by Captain Seals. Is anyone missing a family pet or exotic farm animal? 

Mystery Smeat

A bunch of sides including some weird things called vegetables were on display. Adequate amounts of libations were provided and imbibed as well.  No flip cup or beer pong but cornhole was played and country songs were sung and car drivers were yelled at by rent a cops. Right Suburban Dave?

The Motley Crew

 

The Chefs

Mark the king of bean bag toss AKA corn hole

A little history about the Rose Bowl game:
The tournament of Roses parade began in 1890 in Pasadena, thus was the genesis of what we call the Rose Bowl parade today. In 1902 Pasadena hosted the first Rose Bowl football game pitting Michigan against Stanford.  I am pretty sure Keith Jackson called that game for ABC. The game was such a blowout (49 – 0 in Michigan’s favor) that for the next 13 years the Rose Bowl committee opted to host Chariot races instead of football.  Hence the origins of Keith Jackson’s famous phrase “Whoa Nellie!” has now been uncovered. In 1916 the football game was reintroduced. In most years the game matched a team from the West versus a team from the East/Midwest. Eventually the tradition took hold to match top teams from what are currently the Big 10 and PAC 12 conferences.  In the current BCS format the champion of each of those conferences plays in this game unless they are ranked either #1 or # 2 in the BCS poll and are playing for the national championship.  So there you have it, a history lesson from the Tailgate!

Tickets Please!

It was a beautiful So Cal sunny January day that started off cold, became balmy and ended cold. The Wisconsin Band took the field and performed admirably only to be followed by that joke of a so called Stanford Band. The colors were raised, the anthem sung and we were treated to a B2 Stealth flyover. Man was that ever cool as it was so quiet we did not see it until it was right over us! Many self proclaimed experts including myself did not feel that Wisconsin was worthy of a Rose Bowl invitation as they finished the regular season with 5 losses. Additionally with Penn State and Ohio State ineligible for post season play, it appeared the Badgers got in by default. Nonetheless, the Badgers proved to be up for this most important Bowl Game. The Badgers were coached on this day by former legendary Coach and current AD, Barry Alvarez after the departure of Coach “Curly” Bulimia to the land of Wal Mart Nation.  Barry stepped in for a one game only assignment netting a cool $119 large. Stanford was anchored by a well balanced team on both sides of the ball featuring Danville’s All American Zach Ertz and rising star Quarterback Kevin Hogan and the beast of a linebacker Shane Skov. Stanford overpowered Wisconsin on its first 2 drives taking a 14 – zip lead before the Badgers got their creek legs and introduced a steady diet of Ball, Montee Ball that is. Additionally, the Badger defense sturdied itself and held Stanford to only 2 field goals for the next 40 minutes. The game came down to a potential game winning drive by Wisconsin when the Badger QB threw an INT with 2 minutes left and down by 6.  The Tree hung on to win earning their first Rose Bowl win since 1982.

The B-2 Stealth flyover!

Puff Daddy and Jim McCourt

Dan and a puffier Dave

Wisconsin on the move

 
The most interesting part of the game however, was cocktailing in the first aid station during halftime and the 3^rd quarter with Compadre David Seals. David had a nice Benadryl IV cocktail while I swirled my $10 Miller Lite in the room of the passed out amateurs. You see David had an allergic reaction to a macadamia nut several days prior to the game and was treated with steroids.  The problem is he also had an allergic reaction to the steroids that made his hands and face swell up. I told him he got screwed because he should have opted for the flavor that puffs up your biceps and shoulders. As it was, his ring finger swelled up so badly he lost circulation in his hand. The EMT’s cut off his ring to avoid the pressure. Now some people will go to elaborate lengths to explain to their spouse how they lost their wedding rings but this was ingenious. David, I will support you on this so long as you keep making those payments! Nonetheless the EMT’s did a great job treating David and we returned to our seats before the end of the 3^rd quarter. Others in the aid station remained fast asleep. Never a dull moment in the web of fun at the Tailgate.

Did you just cut my wedding ring off dude?

Rocky after the big fight!

In other games, the Orange Bowl was as bad as predicted however the Sugar Bowl was a major upset with Louisville pounding the mighty Florida Gators in Nawlins. The Northwestern Wildcats got Bonzo off their back with their first Bowl win since 1949 trouncing Mississippi State in the Gator Bowl. In fact, many of the nerd schools (I say that endearingly) did well in Bowls this years with NW, Stanford, Vandy and Rice all securing cracker jack prizes. Only Duke fell to a lesser educated squad. The Ole Ball coach and the Gamecocks knocked off Michigan and Dennard in the Outback Bowl. In the Chick Fil A Bowl a cat fight broke out with the Clemson Tigerz clawing their way to victory over the Bayeux Bengals.  By the way, Chick Fil A is my all time favorite fast food joint, just look at my T&E receipts. In the Citrus Bowl UGA turned the Cornhuskers into compost and planted them in the Turf.  The Fiesta Bowl turned out to be a one sided affair as the Ducks form Eugene flew by the Wildcats of Manhattan and captured the Arizona crystal.

Post game festivities.

 
Okay, so now I am off to the tanning salon and Brazilian waxing shop to ready myself for the big trip to South Beach.  All packed, I have my speedo, flip flops, sunscreen and Notre Dame T's in the bag!!!!

Ready for South Beach!

 Happy Tailgating!

Mid Bowl Season Update

I hope all of you had a Merry Christmas and have enjoyed the Bowl action so far. The great thing about having a hobby like College football is that you will meet many interesting like minded people….yes most are nuts just like this blogger. Through my travels this year, I have now connected with two high profile bloggers/writers Steve Koreivo and Joe Rogers. We all now promote each other’s blogs on our pages. This is a show of solidarity amongst those of us with the most significant addictions. Please be sure to click on the two links on the left side of the page and explore the incredible insight and storytelling of these two talented writers. There is talk already of all the bloggers and many other friends uniting next fall in Oxford, Mississippi for an Ole Miss game and a Tailgate Celebration in the most hallowed acre in all of college footballdom simply known as “The Grove”.

Sometimes in life, fate will be on all our sides. As you are aware, I had a great desire to attend the BCS National Championship game in Miami without breaking the bank to get there. As it turns out, a friend of mine with access to tickets came through with a ticket for face value of $350. He shall now be reffered to as "Larry Clawz" and I am forever grateful. To put this in perspective, that same ticket on Stub Hub and other ticket web sites would be between 2k and 5K. Here is the video of me getting my ticket to the BCS championship game:



Bowl Update

The Tailgate did not travel south to San Diego for the Poinsettia Bowl on 12/20 as rumors of the earth ending the next day would have left us stranded and far away from the doomsday bunker. Okay, the real reason is that there were no business meetings in Southern Cal to be had that week. The Tailgate did however set up shop on 12/29 in San Francisco at AT&T Park for the Kraft Fight Hunger Bowl featuring Navy and Arizona State. Due to forecasted bad weather, we opted for bargating at the numerous pubs and watering holes (Polo Grounds, Lucky Strike) surrounding AT&T Park before and after the game. Veteran Tailgaters Dave “Wannstedt” Quillici, LT. Pat “Wolfman” Wolff and the Legendary Marine, Lance Corporal John “The Sandman” Wintersteen joined the festivities for the day. John is a “Boots on the ground” kind of Marine and will talk to anyone and anything. Also we spent time with Paul Chapla, USNA class of 1963 (Star basketball player) and his wife Sarah, The Queen of England. It’s good to be the Queen! Drubacha, Good Time Reinke and Too Tall Taggert caught up with us and brought Richard Branson with them to sign autographs and pay our tab. Craig C2 Castelein was busy shopping and taking in a show with the girls for the day and had to cancel on us. He was worried that I would call him out on this massive man card violation but I am not that kind of guy. I would never do anything that would bring into question the manhood of a fellow tailgater. Craig, we just want to know if you had balcony or orchestra seats at the play? Although the game was a blowout and Navy did not bring the effort expected of an Academy team, the overall day and atmosphere was exceptional. Blue Skies, warm weather, ample boots and plenty of cold beer. Final score ASU 62, Navy 28. It was not even that close! On the way home we were even courteous enough to teach a member of the Occupy “Bowel” Movement how to properly enter a BART train after everyone has exited first. Of course a little elbow assist always goes along way when teaching morons.

The Fearsome Foursome at AT&T Park




 

Post game ritual at the Polo Grounds Pub

Navy getting rolled by the Sun Devils

 

The USO lovelies entertaining Lt. Wolff



Drubaca joining the fray with his favorite Lucky Strike Barteneder



The Skipper, Gilligan and the Queen.





LT. and the lovely Janine

Not a good advertsiment for this Bowl!

In other Bowls so far: Arizona overcomes a 13 point deficit to Nevada in the final minute to win the New Mexico Bowl. Too bad for those of you that turned the game off a minute too early. The Rich Rod Era has a signature win now. I can hear em down in Sleepy Holler in West By God saying “Ya’ll can keep that Yankee trader out there in the Deee Zert”!

Boise – UW – BREAKING NEWS ALERT– A Boise Kicker actually wins a game for the Broncos against UW on a game winning kick in the Las Vegas Elvis Bowl….somewhere in Idaho Kyle “Ray Finkle” Brotzman is practicing 10 yard field goals.

Ray Finkle



 The Central Michigan Chippewas win the Pizza Bowl against WKU when the Hilltopper’s interim coach Lance Guidry elected to go for it on fourth down instead of kicking the game tying field goal. I doubt ole Lance will be a candidate for any head coaching jobs after that bone headed decision! Congratulations to our favorite local team San Jose State for completing their best season ever with 11 wins after beating Bowling Green in the Military Bowl. Tailgate Brian was one of the 300 fans in attendance at that one. No sign of Munchie Legaux, but Cincinnati without Coach Butch Jones gets the win over Duke in the Belk Bowl 48 - 34. What is a Belk anyway? UCLA’s season came to an unexpected end by getting thrashed by the Bears from Baylor in the Holiday Bowl. Frank Beamer notches his 100th straight winning season with the Hokies overcoming a 10 point deficit in the 4th quarter to upend the Scarlet knights of Piscataway. Sparty gets the win over TCU in an exciting finish with each team exchanging field goals in the final minutes in the Chicken Wing Bowl. Coach Mack Brown may have secured his employment status by engineering a come from behind victory over the Beavers from Corvallis in the Alamo Bowl.

Washington State finally has something to cheer about. Check out this Cougar Christmas light choreography:


 
Gripe of the week: The “Coach Poach” is out of control! Specifically the teams that have qualified for a bowl that have their coaches leave for greener pastures. Is there not any honor amongst thieves? What kind of message does that send to the kids they coach? It’s okay to bail on your duties? This is not the leadership that our kids need. This is perhaps the worst thing about our sport. Here is my solution: As much as I hate most forms of regulation, I believe the NCAA needs to institute a moratorium on “Coach Poach” until after the final bowl game is played. Yeah, I hear the know it alls now saying “but they have to leave otherwise they miss out on recruiting”. Well I have thought of everything, no form of recruiting whatsoever between Thanksgiving and the BCS Championship. Violators will be tarred, feathered and drug into the town square. How’s that sound?

Punishment for Coach Poach!

Let’s have a live look in at our ole friend Cheaty Boy “Christmas”Carroll since I know you all miss him:

Seahawks' Fake Punt After Leading by 30 in Bills Game Questioned

VIBE Posted December 17, 2012

http://www.collegefootballfan.com/Reviews.htm

There's one play from this Sunday's (Dec.16) NFL action that continues to receive harsh criticism from sports lovers.

As the Seahawks faced a fourth-and-4 at the Buffalo 43-yard line, leading on the scoreboard by 47-17 with 12:49 to play in the game, the team went for a fake punt. Many would call it a "cheap play" given the circumstances of the game and the team's substantial lead.

However, Coach Pete Carroll says he didn't call the play on purpose but that it was just a part of their plan before the game even started.

"I feel bad about this," Carroll said. "It was an automatic for us."

Portrait of a classless schmuck

The Seattle Times Reports: Safety Chris Maragos is the upback on that play, the one responsible for diagnosing the opponent's formation. He saw it, called for the fake punt, and took the snap directly. He handed it off to fullback Michael Robinson, who came from the right side of the formation. After handing the ball off, Maragos continued to run as if he had the ball.

The execution couldn't have been better. The timing, however, was a little off.

We looked for it every time we were going to punt, and it was just there,"Carroll said. "I should have stopped it in the sense that it looked bad."

In the view of the Tailgate, a tiger will never change his stripes. Petey boy, you will get yours again.

Next up for the Tailgate is the Rose Bowl on new Year’s day in Pasadena followed by the BCS National Championship game on January 7th in Miami.

Happy new Years and Happy tailgating!