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Monday, September 5, 2011

Week 1 CFB 2011 (Box of Chocolates)




It was suggested to me that the great philosopher, billionaire, war hero, Olympian and former Alabama All American football player Forest, Forest Gump once stated that week one in college football is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are going to get. No truer words were ever spoken when tied to this year’s week one. Who would have predicted that RG III and Mr. Wright from Baylor could do no wrong against the defending Rose Bowl champs? Did anyone ever think that the Quack Attack would turn into the Lack of Attack in the Shrine to Jerry Jones? The Scamless defending champions Auburn War Eagle Tigers barely beating that powerhouse from the WAC, Utah State. Hey Gene, it only cost you $180k large to win a national title last year. You should look for another bargain like that. Oregon State being stung by the mighty Hornets of D1 AA Sacramento State? Seriously Clarke? And of course perhaps the biggest story of the weekend were all the games that were delayed, postponed or called early due to the outrageous storms in the Midwest and Rust Belt. And let’s not overlook that even Jim (I should be suspended for the first 7 games of the colts season) Tressel could have imagined that more players from THE Ohio State University would be suspended. I am shocked!

As we look around the country to games that mattered, we saw contenders, pretenders and surprises. Contenders, Oklahoma, Stanford, Wisconsin and yes Mark May you balloon headed elitist ..Boise State! And of course Forest Gump would throw Alabama into this group as well. Pretenders, Auburn, Oregon, Georgia and TCU. Surprise, Baylor upsetting TCU for those of you that have no Friday Night social life like me and watched it, was clearly the best game of the weekend. Is Baylor for real and is RG III now in the Heisman picture? LSU and Les Miles that crap you see on my face is a slice of humble pie. I called you out as overrated and I was wrong…at least for this week. Nice job in shutting down our fowl weather friends from the north. Kellen Moore, you are just damned good, just ask UGA. Look forward to seeing you at the next level. It was pointed out to me that there has never been a coach at Notre Dame that used more 4 letter words in a single half of play than Monsignor Brian Kelly during the upset loss to Lou Holtz Junior “Skippy”. The Brothers and Knute Rockne must be conferring to discuss reprimands, sanctions and mandatory Novenas for BK. Andrew Luck, all I have to say it's just unfair. You are too good. Leave now for the NFL and leave CFB to the amateurs. Does anyone else think Florida State is overhyped? Rick “office Pool” Neuhisel better get the W against SJSU next week or else he may put on double secret probation by Dean Wormer again. Big Kudos for Northwestern taking down the Eagles in Chestnut Hill, BYU stifling the rebel yell and OK State picking up where they left off last year putting up a basketball score on ULL. Salutes to Navy and Air Force for solid wins. And of course I would be remiss in if I did not send out a personal congratulation to my boy Lame Kiffin and his mighty men of Troy for the squeaker over those world beaters from Minnesota. Did you miss me Lame? I missed you.

Gripe of the week. This of a personal nature. I was subjected to spend the better part of the weekend at my daughters youth soccer tournament up in Santa Rosa during the opening week of College Football. Yes I love my daughter dearly and yes the setting in wine country was stunning but this was like having an open bar at Betty Ford. I am submitting a recommendation to congress for legislation to be passed that there will be no youth activities scheduled on opening weekend ever again. I was so looking forward to riding the horizontal saddle in my family room with remote in hand clicking from game to game. It was not to be. The scene on the sideline was frantic as dads were firing up their 4G I pads and Smart phones religiously checking scores and pretending to cheer their kids on. You know who you are and you do share my pain! The Tailgate did get to participate in a nice Saturday evening backyard tailgate at Vegas Pete’s house with three screens going to catch all the action.

Next week the Tailgate will be hosting a small soirĂ©e of Notre Dame enthusiasts at Dan’s Bar & Grill to watch the Irish make themselves at home in the Big House. 2 weeks to the first big road trip for the Tailgate! The Tailgate was 13-5 in the weekly college football pickem.

RIP Leroy Selmon, you were a beast at OU and changed the way a D lineman played the game.

Happy Tailgating!

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