My new favorite song
In the
summer of 1984 as a young ROTC Cadet at Fort Knox, KY, I was introduced to the
song “Rocky Top” by two fellow Cadets in my barracks, both students at Tennessee.
In fact, I think they even made up marching cadences to Rocky Top a la Bill
Murray in Stripes. Some thirty years later, that song still haunts my medulla oblongata
as I will start humming it for no apparent reason at very inopportune times. On
this picture perfect autumn weekend in Eastern Tennessee, I felt privileged and
honored to be amongst the 100,000 + Orange revelers to hum Rocky Top and welcome
back one of the Tailgate’s all time favorites to the checkered end zone: Mr.
Lane Kiffin, former head coach here. For those of you that don’t remember,
Young Lane was hired to be the Head Coach back in 2009. After one year, he left
the Volunteer Nation hung out to dry so he could chase the glamour and
glitter of Hollywood and return to USC as their head ball coach. Needless to
say, the name Kiffin was less popular than the name Bin Laden in the Smoky
Mountain State. Things did not work out so well in LA for the disciple of Pete
the Cheat, and Lil Lane was spotted in line at a soup kitchen. Saban Clause, AKA
St. Nick did a charitable thing and hired the unemployed boy genius as his OC
prior to this season. And of course he would be greeted with a very warm
welcome inside the imposing Neyland Stadium when the Tide rolled onto the
field.
This weekend
would be a reunion with my high school crew, SVHS class of 1981. Lodgings were
provided by Classmate Tennessee Tony Pifer in his five star cabin in the woods.
However to get to the cabin, one must travel through places that could be rift
with moonshiners, cloggers, snake healers, and toothless banjo strummers. The
hair on my neck stood up on alert as we made our way through the Holler. We
were also joined by Maryland Mike McCabe and the good Doctor himself, Alabama
Al and his family. After spending Friday night recalling just how great and
cool we were 35 years prior and who could beat who up, we were ready for game
day in Knoxville on Saturday. We headed to the Palace on the river known as
Neyland Stadium for a 1:30 PM Tailgate party hosted by Doctor Eddie Hockaday
and his wife Connie. Neyland Stadium is named after legendary Tennessee coach
General Robert Neyland. Neyland was the Vols coach from 1926 -1952 with a
hiatus to go serve his country in the CBI Theater during WWII. This has added
meaning to me as my Father served as an Army Air Corps Officer in Burma and
India during the big one. General Neyland also coached the Vols to four
National Championships. With UT being a city school, tailgating space is at a
premium with the orange clad fanatics setting up wherever possible. The Hockaday
party was located on the top deck of the parking garage just next to the
stadium with a view of the river down below. In the river there is a phenomena
dating back almost 50 years called “Boatgating”. This is an event where boat
owners from around Tennessee lash up together for an all day Tailgate on the
water. Some of the larger boats even had live music, dancing girls and congressional
hearings for entertainment. This is one of the top bucket list events to
witness in all of college football. Our Tailgate consisted of a mixture of Vol
and Tide families and friends. In our walkabout we found a camera man filming a
sign attached to a microphone that said “What would you tell Lane
Kiffin?” Many a warm hearted Vol fan stepped up to the Mic and let little Lane
know they were just so ecstatic to see him again. We found the Tailgate crowd at UT to be
spirited but mostly respectful.
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| Tennessee Tailgating! |
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| The good Doctor seeking Legal advice |
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| Orange Crush! |
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| General Neyland's commanding view |
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| Say hello to my little Lane |
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| Tailgating with the Alabama Al family. Note the Harbaugh Mom pants on the good Doctor. |
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| Boatgating on the Banks of the river. |
As a cruel Joke,
Alabama Al stuck us non partisan so called friends in the Alabama section of
the stadium in the upper tier of this massive structure. Let’s just say if
there was a tornado touching down in Tennessee it would have torched our seats
for several reasons. This was not the same polite clientele we tailgated with
during the afternoon. The Vol Nation filled the stadium for the 7:30 kickoff cloaked
in their bright Orange attire accompanied with their all day tailgate glo. The
Pride of The Southland UT Marching band took the field and formed a giant
letter T. Smokey the Blue Tick Hound mascot led the Team out onto the field
through the giant T to the approval of the Orange people. The Pride belted out
Rocky Top for the first of several hundred times of the night. The sellout
crowd of 102,455 fans was singing in unison at the top of their lungs. With all
the pageantry and nighttime magic that Knoxville has presented so many times,
the fans expected a great effort out of their underdog Vols. Coach “Sergeant Carter” from Gomer Pyle (AKA
Butch Jones) was fired up as well.
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| Separated at Birth - Sgt Carter and Butchy |
Nonetheless,
Alabama sucked the rarified air out of the behemoth bowl before the first
quarter ended. Apparently, Lane and Nick drafted up their own script for how
Lane’s return to Neyland would be. Bama ended the first set with a 20 - 0 lead spearheaded
by spectacular play from All American Amari Cooper and QB Blake Sims and a
stout D. LK was seen running up and down the sideline in his visor encouraging
his boyz to show em who the boss is. Bama scored again to start the second
quarter before Tennessee had decided to give us our money’s worth. From that
point on, UT outplayed Alabama by outscoring the Tide 20 - 7. But as higher
math will learn ya, 27+7 is still more than 20. I will say that even though Tennessee
has seen better days, the atmosphere, passion and traditions that the Vol
Nation brings to game day is amongst the best in the country. This is a program
that claims six national titles throughout time. They will rise again much to
the chagrin of the rest of the SEC.
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The Grandiose Neyland Stadium with the unmistakable checkered End Zones
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As an added
bonus, I was also able to catch the Thursday night ESPN game in Blacksburg, VA
between The VA Tech Hokies and the Hurricanes from the U. I met up
with my College buddy and Rugby Teammate Terry Kernan who drove in from D.C. to
join me because he heard I would score us some free turkey legs. After illegally
parking at the Holiday Inn across from Campus we snuck on their shuttle bus
that took us to campus. We learned the first stop was the Tailgate party
sponsored by the Holiday Inn. So what are two grown men to do when presented
with an opportunity to crash a party, eat someone else’s food, drink their beer
and insult the guests? You answered correctly if you said “tailgate crash”. We also
met up with Terry’s friend John Malone at his Beergate in Lot 1 along with his Fraternity
crew that graduated from VT in 1983. They have been doing a Thursday night game
reunion annually in Blacksburg with guys coming in from different parts of the
country for 30 years. The Hokie faithful have grown restless since their week
two upset of Ohio State who at the time was ranked #4 in the country. Since
that time VT has been on a downward spiral. Some even have spoken the
unspeakable and are calling for legendary Coach Frank Beamer’s resignation.
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| John Malone and Terry with me at the Beergate. |
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| I'm not a Tailgater but I did crash a Holiday Inn Tailgate last night. |
Thursday night
games at VA Tech are legendary. The Hokie fans are as passionate as any and
pack the 65,000 seat Lane Stadium for home games and provide as hostile an atmosphere
for opposing teams to play in as I have seen. They have a ritual when the team
takes the field before the game where the whole stadium bounces up and down to Metallica’s
“Enter Sandman”. The crowd erupts and the players stream out on to the field
and fireworks go off beyond the south end zone.
Enter Sandman
VA Tech is also
one of only two non-military colleges that have a Corps of Cadets. They packed
the south end zone while the students and the Marching Band occupy the North.
Another unique feature at Lane is hearing a Turkey gobble over the PA system to
get the fans fired up throughout the game. However all of the pageantry and non
game activity was the most action the Hokies would produce on this night.
Miami’s Duke Johnson ran roughshod over VT for 250 yards and 2 TDs on the night
as Miami feasted on the Hokies 30 - 6. Regardless, this venue still provided an
awesome week night game atmosphere.
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| Lane Stadium on a Thursday Night |
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| My former basketball player Erika Perez |
Around the Country – Despite what ESPN
would have you believe, there is more to CFB than the SEC West. That is why you
come to DFT for your information. That being said, LSU proved once again that
Death Valley is the place where not only opposing team’s dreams come to die,
but national championship aspirations also meet the same fate. Ole Miss found
this out the hard way Saturday night as they came into Baton Rouge undefeated
and walked out with a blemish on their record. The Hat (Coach Miles) asked the
Rebs “how’s that grass taste boys?” The
TCU Horned Frogs Basketball squad beat up on the Texas Tech Red Raiders
Football squad 82 - 27. And it pains me to say that our beloved Trojans from USC
dropped another one to Utah 24 - 21. Mark Dantoni put one more stake in Big Brady
Hoke’s inevitable fate as Sparty won Big against Big Brother Michigan in the
Big House 35 - 11.
Bieber Award – After consulting with my
Bieber committee we decided it was a light week in bad Biebhavior. However if
we go back to last Saturday after WVU upset Baylor, I think we found our
winner. You see, it is normal behavior in Morgantown, WV to burn couches after
a big Mountaineer victory. I am not sure why, other than maybe them boyz drop
their fatties on their moonshine soaked couches and voila, you have your
instant heat source all by accident. Nothing new, right? Well, after the Baylor
win there must have been extra moonshine and bulletproof liquid courage as the
hillbillies burned everything in their path including the traditional couches,
pulled down lamp poles and rioted like anarchists. The MOTO PO PO had to be
brought in to get the town under control to calm the LA Laker fans down. Reports
indicated that the town looked no different the next day then it normally does.
The ironic part is past Bieber Winner the bow tied smug dork Gordon Gee, former
Chancellor at Ohio State now the Cheese at WVU had to lecture the students on
their unsportsmanlike behavior. So to the fans of WVU, not only do you get
College Gameday next week, you are this week’s winner of the vaunted Bieber
Award!
Next Week - The Tailgate will make its
way to the Palouse for the first time to watch Wazoo host USC, I will be joined
by USC die hard Major Mark Rodrick, USMC (R) and he is making me sit with the USC
section. I think I will wear my Notre Dame Schwag.
Happy Tailgating!
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| Our classless reunion - McCabe, Dan, Al & Tony |
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| The BC Eagle crew celebrating a victory at Wake with the Mother of All Foxes, my sister Pats! |
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